It’s not The Tackler’s 4th birthday for another week and a half – the arrival of which is guaranteed to send me into a nostalgic “where did the time go” tale spin.
Yet today, I had a Mommy Epiphany: My baby boy is growing up.
I blame Wal-mart.
You see, Tuesday morning CG and I had an entirely different epiphany: the mythical Box of Lil Diva Diapers I thought was in the garage, was in fact… NOT.
It was also not in the house.
We only had a few diapers left.
As any parent knows, this is just begging for your child to suddenly have Epic Excrement Expulsions.
Running to Wal-mart was immediately moved to the top of Tuesday’s To Do List Before Insanely Cold Weather Part Deux Strikes.
As with every Wal-mart excursion, I failed to buy just the item that instigated my visit.
I stocked up. Mostly on cereal – where I can buy the larger boxes with cheaper prices than at my grocery store. We’re talking about eight grocery bags worth of just cereal boxes… add a few other random items in, plus the diapers, and my cart was filled to the brim.
Lil Diva passed out before we even left their parking lot.
After I laid her down, I asked The Tackler if he’d like to help me unload the groceries.
“Okay, I’ll help you Mommy.”
As I removed the bags from the van, The Tackler grabbed three to four at a time and haphazardly lugged them into the kitchen.
Everything bagged, he carried, only leaving me with the laundry detergent, and two boxes of diapers and baby wipes.
Once inside, he unpacked all of the bags (nothing breakable was purchased), and handed me the items as I stood on a chair and stocked most of them high in the pantry.
He did it all with that amazing almost four year old eagerness, as though we were playing a game.
I was so proud. He was truly a big help, not the more typical I’m-helping-but-in-a-way-that-creates-more-work-for-you.
And I wanted to cry just like I did the first three times I watched the very end of Toy Story 3.
Because my baby boy is no longer a baby – he’s becoming a little man.
I’m not certain I’m ready for him to grow up.
As I rubbed my eyes with exhaustion, I sighed and shook off my Mommy Epiphany.
Because Wednesday is a new day.
We’ve had two days of The Good Boy, while the Dark Side lies in wait – probably for the freezing rain forecasted so I’ll be trapped with cranky kids in the house.
When it decides to rear its masked Testing the Terrible Threes face again, I know I’ll be counting down to having him finally grow up.
Well… maybe.
An attempt to wake him up from a rare late nap relapses and he promptly passes back out on my lap.
Is there a way he can become my Big Man yet still give me cuddles? Because I don’t want to lose that.
Anyone?
Dances with Chaos 
I wish I had the answer, a magic spell or two to keep our babies as such! I can tell you that I have 3 boys..22yr, 18yr, and the lil informa who just last week turned 5!! The older one’s obviously don’t fit on my lap to cuddle but…the cuddles and messy kisses from the older two have turned into warm kisses on the forehead( yes mom is short) and strong comforting bear hugs. The informa insists he will not grow up like his big brothers, because he always wants to sit on mom’s lap! ( if he only knew how I wish that was possible)
If there are bear hugs I might be able to cope. This must be why parents start craving grandchildren – our children outgrow us and will no longer fit on our laps.
For now, I’m going to try to enjoy each moment and phase, although I really could do with whiny teething crankiness.
And the lap time.
My “big man” still hugs me every day. If he knows I told you, he’ll stop. So, it’s our little secret, okay?
I can’t lose those hugs.
Thanks for reading.
Awwww!! What a sweetie! Gosh, it’ll be school next… !
Yeah, we’ll have to see about the school thing. Something I dread and look forward to.
The only thing that makes me less antsy about losing my baby boy to manhood is that I am the mommy.
If I do it just right, I will always be number 1 lady. Who can beat my cooking?
No one I say!