Smooth Operator, the Missed Dinner, and a Fire-Breathing…. Tiger?

Last night at my birthday dinner, my son turned to me as if to gift me with some awesomeness.

4.5 years old and already a smooth operator...

“Mommy, you need to get a really big shake for you for your birthday.”

“And I get to have it all to myself?”

“You have to remember to share it with everyone.”

* * *

Lil Diva insisted on having Jimmy John’s with me for lunch. Knowing The Tackler wouldn’t be happy with PB&J while the rest of us ate Jimmy John’s, I purchased a sub for the kids to share and saved his PB&J sandwich. The Tackler finally ate it at 5 PM. CG came home and we went about our night.

Just before bed, The Tackler turned to CG.

“I didn’t have dinner tonight, Daddy.”

He filled his words with woe and sadness, as though his father and I failed in our parenting duties.

Because PB&J sandwiches (and soup) are only lunch food.

But somehow pancakes can count as dinner….

* * *

Lil Diva was passed out for a nap, and The Tackler took the opportunity to talk my ear off.

He spoke of a tiger with flames in its mouth, a monkey, and a bird that crashed and saw stars.

I'm pretty sure he didn't mean the one in Quackshot, a 1991 video game from Sega.

I was utterly lost. “I don’t understand.”

He explained again, using almost exactly the same descriptions.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said, still clueless as to what movie had fire-breathing tigers.

“Mommy, listen to the words coming out of my mouth.”

His tone and facial expressions perfectly captured my own, used when his superpower of not listening is cranked up to eleven.

His irritation went up a few notches as I dissolved into giggles.

I couldn’t help it.

It took a day before I figured out he was talking about Aladdin, which he’d seen in the gym’s childcare.

I still don’t recall a tiger “with flames in the back of its throat” in that movie….

Has your child ever tried to describe something in detail, and gotten mad at you because you could not read their mind and see what they saw?

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About Kelly K @ Dances with Chaos

Kelly K has learned the five steps to surviving of motherhood: 1) Don't get mad. Grab your camera. 2) Take a photograph. 3) Blog about it. 4) Laugh. 5) Repeat. She shares these tales at Dances with Chaos in order to preserve what tiny amount of sanity remains. You can also find her on her sister blog, Writing with Chaos (www.writingwithchaos.com) sharing memoir and engaging in her true love: fiction writing. It's cheaper than therapy.
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15 Responses to Smooth Operator, the Missed Dinner, and a Fire-Breathing…. Tiger?

  1. John says:

    It’s good that he already sees brinner as a valid dinner . . . but, he needs to get over that “no lunch food for dinner,” because sammiches for dinner are wonderful.

  2. lexy3587 says:

    lol… the giant sand-tiger thing… with glowyness in theback of its throat 😛
    i’ll admit, though, his description of aladdin seems to ignore the overall plot. I wouldn’t have guessed aladin at all.

    • In my head, the sand-tiger-thing is more of a panther. I haven’t see the movie in a decade at least and the only tiger I could think of was Raja.

      Who does not have flames.

      Time to pull out my VHS copy… Oh wait, do I have a working VCR anymore…?

      Thanks for the comment!

  3. Sparky says:

    WOW…I totally GOT the tiger description!!! 😛

  4. LOL. I often get (usually from William): “Mom! You’re not really listening to me.”

    And he’s right. I’m usually not.

    Sigh. My attention span for summaries of what he watches on TV is not what it should be…

    • In this instance I was trying very hard to understand, and things just weren’t clicking…

      His TV is also limited to what I show him and what they show in the child care center, so it greatly limits the options to choose from.

      That being said, I remember now how his obsession with a “big tall mountain” confounded me and frustrated him for weeks. I finally learned it was a Dora episode they showed at the gym.

  5. All kids are born under the delusion that we can read minds. I have experienced this with all three of my kids, repeatedly!

    • It is just becoming very apparent to me how true this is. I already knew they expected me to psychically determine what food they wanted and why they were cranky, but I did not think my 4.5 year old assumed I knew all shows, even if I didn’t watch it with him.

      I consider myself educated now.

  6. Trish Loye Elliott says:

    I wouldn’t have guessed Alladin but he’s describing the tiger’s head when it appears out of the sand and then there’s flames in it’s mouth. “Listen to what I’m saying.” Yeah, it sounds just as bad when I describe it. 😉 (It’s the entrance to the cave where A finds the lamp)

    • LOL.

      Your description does sound very similar to his, only he left out the whole sand part.

      I eventually figured out he had to mean the Cave of Wonders kitty cat, but I couldn’t remember when there were flames inside it.

      I can still sing all of the songs, though…

  7. Ahhh my first thought wouldn’t have been Alladin either, but now I totally get it. My older boys frequently say “Mom, I already told you!” And get completely annoyed when they have to repeat themselves. Gee, I have NO IDEA where they got that from!! 😉

  8. Pingback: Smooth operator « Belle Essentials

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