Imperfect Math, Shredded Phones, and WTF is Mommy?

Somewhere there is a list of funny things my son said last week.

I haven’t been able to locate it.


Hopefully I can find it in the near future.


Tackler Math

I’m driving to the gym and my son demands my attention.

“Mommy! MOMMY!”

The Tackler enjoys a frozen fruit smoothie-cicle I made from the blended leftovers. It was a hit.

“Yes sweetie?”

“Twenty plus twenty is forty.”

“That’s right! Good job!”

“And twenty-one plus twenty-one is forty-one.”


“Um. No. Twenty-one plus twenty-one is forty-TWO. Twenty plus twenty-one is forty-one.”

“No Mommy. Twenty-one plus twenty-one is. Forty. ONE!”

And we continue, his insistence at his fuzzy math threatening to lead into a meltdown.

“Count it out when we get to the gym, and you’ll see.”

I love his interest in math, but it’s so hard to teach a four year old who is convinced he holds all the correct answers.


* * *

Shredded Phone

Lil Diva hit the 22 month mark last week. That leaves two months until I have a two year old and a four (and a half) year old. I bounce between being thrilled and wondering if she’ll be a Terrible Two, wait for The Threes, or save it up for four and older.

One of her favorite games is to steal her brother’s shoes, grab a bucket of stuff, and tear out a page from one of the paper books.

Then use this page as a cell phone.

She clutches this paper to her ear, and talks. And talks. Because for some reason, the three or four play phones laying around just don’t get the same high quality reception.

Then when she’s done talking? She shreds the sheet of paper.

I think she’s already preparing to be a spy.

Here is a video of her talking on her paper. I believe somehow Mimi is on the other line, based on snippets of her conversation.

* * *

WTF is Mommy?

Lil Diva has another new game to play.

I call it “Invisible Mommy” or “WTF is Mommy?”.

As we leave the child care at the gym, she bolts.

She walks into the first doorway – that of the director of the child care.

She holds her arms up, hands flexed, in the universal “What?” sign and says to whoever happens to be in there, “Where’s Mommy?”

They laugh as I catch up to my little escape artist as she whirls around. “Mommy!”

And off she goes, to the next door. This time, I stand no more than three feet from her as she repeats the gesture and question.

The adult bestows a look on me, as if saying “She is your daughter, right? Why is she inquiring as to your location?”

She visits every office that has an open door as we continue down the hallway.

There are a lot of doors.

Each time I turn magically invisible as she walks through the door frame, until she twists to face me and grins with her shout of “Mommy!”

Her smile and grin charm everyone she meets as they realize the rules to her game.

If no person is in the office, she skips it.

Sometimes. Other times she asks the paper shredder where I’m located.

It’s a strange game, but I admit I like it.

Because each time she asks for me, she finds me, and returns to my side.

Unlike the days we she just bolts and I have to race to catch her before she explores the men’s locker.

What funny games do your children create?

*Note to those who read this blog with Google Reader: For some reason, when I update an older post, it tosses that blog into your reader. I am currently updating my categories which involve tweaking a lot of older posts moved from Blogger. So if something appears in the reader where I mention the horrors of potty training and a 10 month old – you know why.

About Kelly K @ Dances with Chaos

Kelly K has learned the five steps to surviving of motherhood: 1) Don't get mad. Grab your camera. 2) Take a photograph. 3) Blog about it. 4) Laugh. 5) Repeat. She shares these tales at Dances with Chaos in order to preserve what tiny amount of sanity remains. You can also find her on her sister blog, Writing with Chaos ( sharing memoir and engaging in her true love: fiction writing. It's cheaper than therapy.
This entry was posted in Lil Diva, Milestones, Tacklerisms, The Tackler and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Imperfect Math, Shredded Phones, and WTF is Mommy?

  1. Funny. My twins still play versions of hide-and-seek. If they have a puzzle that is too easy, they play hide-and-seek puzzle pieces. Yesterday, I introduced them to kid Jeopardy, my own creation. Pretty sure this is going to be its own blog post.

  2. Jaime Dittman says:

    hey, we use those Popsicle things. we love to put left over smoothy in them. family is cute as ever.

  3. Adorable! Li’l D only plays the standard peek-a-boo as far as I can recall, but I do adore that. 🙂

  4. Next time she can’t find you, try calling her on a piece of paper…
    (that is about the cutest thing I’ve seen in a while.)

    As for math, maybe the Tackler can tutor me. Because at four and a half, he’s more advanced than I am. And I am 42.

    I think. (I like his addition better.)

  5. Kim says:

    No cute games that I can think of…. Dickie did tell me, though…. the other day, that I was his best friend. Then he whispered for me not to tell anyone though. 😦 lol

  6. I try to be a supportive dad by agreeing with whatever math they throw my way.

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