I’m have a problem.
A very big big problem.
I have a condition that affects many of us out there, yet there is no cure in sight, short of drugging oneself into oblivion.
I speak of the plague known as Brain Will Not Shut Off Syndrome.
During the day, this condition could almost be called a blessing. A way to multitask and accomplish the 4.21 trillion things we pack into our far too short 24 hours days.
It is only the late hours of the night, or the wee hours of the morning that we see the true horrors of what Brain Will Not Shut Off Syndrome does to one’s life.
Today, due to Stuff I Must Do In One Hour, I will elaborate on the cause of this blog: The Wee Hours of the Morning Brain Will Not Shut Off Syndrome.
Something wakes you from that nice, cozy, warm cocoon of sleep. It could be a coughing child, your bladder, a dream that makes Alice in Wonderland seem realistic, or your spouse rolling over and stabbing you in the ribs with their elbow. Or a combination of any of the above.
No matter the reason. You’re awake. And the clock’s time: Way Too Damn Early For Whatever You Have Planned that Day. So you try to go back to sleep.
Sometimes, you think you’re asleep. Then you see only fifteen minutes has passed on the clock.
Instead of slipping back into the dreamworld, your brain has (without permission) kicked into full gear and already started going through whatever is on the agenda today. This is most common on days where there actually is an agenda. An appointment. A plane to catch.
A two hour drive to Six Flags with the Tackler and CG while Lil Diva stays with Mimi.
Then things pop into your brain like (but not limited too):
- Snacks. Lots and lots of snacks.
- More changes of clothes than one child could possibly need in one day because in theory, they are Potty Trained. In actuality, Poopapalooza could happen at any time.
Plus, you aren’t sure how they’ll feel if they get wet on the rafting or log flume ride. Or if they will even go on them. And it might rain.
- Diapers. And Wipes. Just in case.
- Pajamas. Just in case he crashes on the way home.
- Entertainment. All hail Pixar movies for long car rides. Tackler likes them too.
- Everything pre-prepped for Mimi to watch Lil Diva. Because if she needs something, we’ll most likely be too busy getting ready to hurl while riding the tea cups (I can’t see that bothering Tackler based on dancing performed in the previous post) to answer the phone.
- Laundry. Wait. I can put that off. Again.
- Food. I’m hungry.
- Blogging. I’m going through withdrawal.
- If I go back to sleep now, I’ll feel more tired when I have to get up in the now thirty scant minutes I have left to sleep in. Damn.
So you get up. You haul yourself out of bed. You get to work on the things your brain was so fracking insistent upon that you didn’t even get six hours of sleep.
When you will be outside at an amusement park ALL day.
Sometimes, Brain makes really poor choices.
And on my List of Things That Wouldn’t Let Me Sleep, what have I accomplished? Food. And Blogging.
Hey, it’s my birthday. I can blog if I want to.
Time to finish the rest of the stuff.
I hope I survive. And maybe have a little fun in the process.