The Bad, The Good, and The Stinky

My fingers itch with the need to write. Words battle in my brain, fighting for the chance to escape to the page. Not just to blog,  but to create. A novel. A tale. A short story. Something. Anything.

Alas, I barely have the time to blog (I should be doing laundry…), much less fulfill the other wish. So blogging it shall be.

Surprisingly, I cannot blame or curse the House of Chaos for driving me crazy 24/7 these last few days to the point where I have no brain to blog.

Nope. For once, it is entirely my fault. And CG’s. And Mother Nature’s.

Lil DIva passes out on Bobbi.

Thursday night we had a make-up volleyball game which sucked a greater part of the evening away. This was only the second time CG and I were able to play in the same game (usually, we must take turns due to lack of baby-sitter).

Victory was ours!

Bobbi did not fare as well while we were gone. The Tackler, who in shocking move took a three hour nap, was still asleep when I left to go play.

He was NOT happy to find me gone when he awoke. It was my partly my fault for not forewarning him about being gone, but I was surprised we had enough people to make up a game that night.

Add that to a rare three hour nap. Oh, if I’d possessed the Magical Parenting Crystal Ball I would’ve warned him to the possibility before his nap time. It didn’t help that he had “bathroom difficulties” where he tried every five minutes but to no avail.

The Tackler reenacts his disappointment at finding me gone.

The Tackler doesn’t tend to react well when his routine is altered from the norm, unless he has been prepared for it in advance. Meltdowns ensued. Bobbi had SO much “fun” with these.

Then came Friday.

CG and I escaped to a movie theatre and saw Inception. We’re very picky about the movies we watch at the theatre (as you can buy the DVD for less than the cost of two adults going, not to mention scheduling around sitter and nursing times) and it did NOT disappoint.

Awesomely amazing.

For dinner CG and I nearly packed away the entire tub (yes, TUB) of popcorn we ordered. The two and half hours flew by.

We left the theatre, and I cringed in preparation as I called Bobbi to see how her afternoon went with the Chaos Kids.

Lil Diva "talks" to Cooper puppy while he visited with Bobbi - this was before she had a fear of dogs who were too close.

I was once again shocked – but thrilled – to hear that both children were on their best behavior. According to Bobbi they played well apart AND together.

They allowed her to cook and clean (yes, I checked the sky for flying pigs).

The Tackler constructed towers in his sandbox.

Lil Diva exer-sauced and stomped on the deck, reveling in the cool sound.

Both played with The Cooper Puppy (Bobbi’s dog).

We headed home, anxious to see if our children had somehow been kidnapped and swapped with identical alien replicas who were plotting to take over the world.

I needn’t have worried. We didn’t even make it home before Bobbi called.

“Yeah, your son tried to go to the bathroom and (even though he just went a little bit ago successfully) didn’t make it.”

Surely he was wearing a diaper?

“No, I put him in underwear. It’s everywhere. He’s going to need a bath.”


Lil Diva "sauces" on the deck for a bit.


Fyi, Bobs (or any other parent potty training for the first time), when I tell you my child hasn’t filled the potty or his diaper in over three days, once it starts arriving, it will be a recurring performance. Often with little warning. NOT a good time for underwear.

Also NOT a good night for a bath, as CG later found out.

Still, we had fun playtime as a family, we watched So You Think You Can Dance (which Lil Diva danced along with), we read books.

The Tackler gives castle building tips to Cooper puppy.

Then the only other fly in Friday’s soup was revealed.

Or rather. Flies. But not really flies, so much as another group of insects. The Blood Sucking variety.

Unbeknownst to Bobbi, both children were secretly devoured by mosquitoes while playing outside earlier that evening.

I don’t blame her for feeding my children to them. She is one of those “Mosquitoes Don’t Bother Me” blessed ones.

Unlike my two children who emit a scent that yells, “EAT ME! I DON’T KNOW HOW TO SQUASH YOU YET!”

Sneaky buggers.

The mosquitoes. Not my children.

This time.

Updated 7-19-11: I am so grateful to be in between potty training. And I miss the era when Lil Diva still had no fear of dogs.


About Kelly K @ Dances with Chaos

Kelly K has learned the five steps to surviving of motherhood: 1) Don't get mad. Grab your camera. 2) Take a photograph. 3) Blog about it. 4) Laugh. 5) Repeat. She shares these tales at Dances with Chaos in order to preserve what tiny amount of sanity remains. You can also find her on her sister blog, Writing with Chaos ( sharing memoir and engaging in her true love: fiction writing. It's cheaper than therapy.
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