I have already given up writing a title for my blogs until after they are written. I’m likely to go off on odd tangents that any history teacher would be proud of (because in my experience, history teachers NEVER actually follow any outline they’ve written for class). So I’ll just have to see where this post wanders and title it after the fact.
I just escaped a “blogging trap.” Think of what I refer to as the “wikipedia trap” (G-ma, wikipedia is sort of an online encyclopedia, only it’s full of links so if anything looks interesting, you just click the link and go to the next article). This is where you look one thing up on wikipedia, and then follow a link, then another link, and then suddenly an hour as passed and you are nowhere close to where you started your search. It’s interesting, but a time suck.
Today I looked at a link of a blog my friend Jaime follows of someone who has a set of twins plus another little one.
I couldn’t stop reading it. Too many points hit home and I see Lil Diva attempting many of their shenanigans in the future. A description of how challenging a simple run to the store can be hit home.
It makes me very glad I only have two children. And that Lil Diva hasn’t reached the “I get to decide what I want to wear” phase. I just have a feeling about her. She will have very strong opinions about her fashion. The question is, at what age will it kick in?
On second thought, she already does make her opinion known. She does NOT like clothes, and would rather be naked. That makes her happy. Give her some water to splash in and she’s in heaven.
It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who has “those” days. Mine are often a veritable roller coaster, with the highs and lows dictated by how cooperative the kiddos are that day.
I had the month where almost every day had me thinking I must’ve been insane to want two children. Lock me up and call me certifiably crazy. This was when Lil Diva learned to crawl.
“But Kelly, you’ve already dealt with one crawler. You know how to baby proof.”
That is true. The house was never really “unproofed” after my son. The house itself is fine. The biggest problem with the house was keeping his smaller toys away from her.
“Then what was the problem?”
The issue wasn’t with baby proofing, so much as the sudden need to toddler proof a baby.
I’ve lost you. Allow me to explain. Lil Diva WAS a baby. Then she started crawling. To my son this meant she lost baby status. In fact, it meant she was the perfect someone to bump into, tackle, push over.. (insert other three year old activities here).
So my sweet gentle toddler turned into demon spawn overnight, with the seeming express purpose to eliminate his tiny sister. Every time they were in the same room together, it happened. I couldn’t leave them alone for thirty seconds to use the bathroom, or do laundry, or cook food. To do so resulted in Lil Diva crying and my son (now dubbed “The Tackler” for his actions) having time-out after time-out after time-out. Some days I swear he spent most of the day in it (or at least when Lil Diva was awake). I was overcome with sadness because she ADORES her brother and I couldn’t comprehend why he was acting so mean when he’d been so sweet up until this point.
I was physically and emotionally exhausted.
It was horrible. Short of locking one of them away in cage, I had no idea what I could do to break the cycle. I became Angry Grouchy Mommy who spent her time scolding and correcting and punishing. Most of the joy was sucked out of my day. If it wasn’t for my two hour gym break in the mornings, I probably would’ve lost my mind entirely.
Then the light at the end of the tunnel finally got brighter. My son stopped attacking her EVERY time he was within a foot of her. I was able to do some fun activities with him again.
He even started learning what his sister liked and playing with her (like peekaboo and the laughing game). He did Lil Diva Blockades, where he completely surrounded her with every toy (of hers) he could locate. We’re still working on the how she doesn’t have to stay in that spot and no, you shouldn’t pick her up and force to stay there, but it’s progress.
Then today another parent at the childcare center at the gym told me they saw the cutest thing ever: The Tackler protecting Lil Diva as she walked.
What??? Seriously??? MY boy?
Could it be?
I’m hoping my sweet (and very energetic) boy has finally given up on killing his sister. Or at least maiming her.
Hey, a mother can hope, right?